Zaire+Hatchin

Zaire, you have a really good start here. I agree with you that the screenplay format adds to the drama, the suspense, and the truth. However, this essay needs a lot more explanation. Close-ups do add to the drama, but why? Explain this. I think that should be your textual evidence, it just needs to be explained better. The other two details are more of a stretch. THe other details can be explained better as well.

SCREENPLAY DRAMA I like the screenplay because it has lots of drama, suspense, and the truth.

The screenplay has lots of drama because...... On one scene it will say something like ''close up of inmate two I don't care what you are never get close to a murderer or a pedhophile. When your doing a play you might forgot a line then another person would get angry. Also, they might quit and the whole play is screwed up.

SCREENPAY SUSPENSE The screenplay has lots of suspense because.....

The crazy robbery causing Mr. Nesbitt his death. The actions and thoughts of the diablos gang was so outrageous. When the police took steve and the was chasing the police car that was crazy. The fighting that the dude had to do to get into the diablos gang was straight wierd and wrong.

SCREENPLAY TRUTH The screenplay has the truth because of Steve saying he didn't kill Nesbitt. Steve was telling the truth because he was the lookout not the killer. The mean petroceli not giving up wanting steve to be in the hole four life.

Free Time

Kids do all kinds of things wether it's good not. I will suggest you to read my essay and take my advice on how to use your freetime. I will talk about three topics choose and then act. They will be about talent, expressing your self, and keeping you out of trouble. Drawing is a great use of free time because it helps you reaveal your talent, it allows you to express, and it keeps you out of trouble.

One reason drawing is such a great activity is because it gives you a chance to reveal your real talent. It gives you that because you might be born with it, or you might have to practice and progress off of that. Next, it can be an addicting, or you can just discover it and be pretty good.I discovered my work by just doodling and my drawing was really good. Lastly it can help you impress people, gives you a chance to be yourself,and to make differences.

Free time can help you express yourself in many ways. One way is it can help you take out your anger by drawing the picture and punching the picture in the face. Instead, of actually doing it just draw the whole situation to calm yourself down. Another way it can help express is by just drawing to take you mind off f it, so when you draw your just thinking about drawing. For example I got in trouble for almost fighting so when I got home I started drawing and forgot about the whole situation.

Another reason free time keeps you out of trouble is by drawing. For example instead of bad friends saying lets go bust this lady's windows you could say nah um just going to stay at home and draw. Next you will have to do your chores and objectives in order to draw so it helps you get you work done. Lastly free time will keep you out of trouble by not thinking negative and rise above others.

Find your hobby, embrace it, and rise above others. Drawing is the thing for me because it's fun and it keeps you busy.

character sketch Jordan is the wierdest person you will ever know.He laughs at the wierdest times,ad makes jokes that is far from funny.Also,while looking like a panda ,he sorta dresses nice.He thinks he is the best i basketball .Lets get back to the clothes when I said becausenice I ment nerdy.He will come out of nowhere talkin bout 'oooo he burped hahaha.Jordan is fun to be around because he always puts n a show.He thinks he is the most swagging person in the world.Jordan also thinks he is Einstien ''I once had a test, I need help so I asked Einstien and he got it wrong.We all celebrated although he got many questions wrong in the past it was so funny because,he was so sure he got the question right.

Boxing: I know some things about boxing.I know they fight in a ring with 4 post and tthey also like to win their fights.Next boxing is like a deadly sport because of jabs,hooks,uppercuts,and more.Their are referees that are in the ring with them to make sure they dont cheat in any type of way.Also, their are boxing champs like Floyd Maywether ,Victor Ortiz, and many more.Also,boxers have many techniques to brutally beat their competition.I personally like boxing because my cousin took it and showed me some techniques,and a good fightig stance.